It’s really unnerving when you sit in a coffeehouse with wireless access at least once a day. The same place, generally around the same time, and you see the same people over and over again.

Most of these people appear sane, rational and seem to have something going on. Here at Epic right now there are a bunch of people who look like college/grad students from the UofA, some people who look like they’re doing actual work, and a few people who look like they just wanted a snack and some coffee and are reading/chatting/etc.

Then there are the three or four regulars whose eyes belie a kind of general insanity. You look at them and you think “helter skelter…helter skelter…” You think “GET THAT FUCKER AWAY FROM THE CHILDREN!”

This makes me wonder: Do I appear sane and rational and seem to have something going on to the rest of these people or do they look at me like I look at that old man with the crazy ZZ Top beard who yells at people who talk too loudly next to him?

He sits in the same spot every day, never talks to anyone, and, if I had to guess, and I am, is plotting something nefarious.

To paraphrase Tom Waits, “What’s he doing over there? What the hell is he doing over there?”

I just bet there is a warrant out for him. And if there isn’t then the FBI should be notified.

It’s scary when you’re not sure if you’re the crazy one of if you’ve got something going on and it’s just taking a little time to hatch the plan.

The plan…yeah…you didn’t hear that. Just forget everything about the fucking plan!You did not hear about a plan or anything related to a plan and if you did you would rather fucking die than mention it. Right!

Yeah. I thought so motherfucker.

The first rule is, you do not talk about it.

The second rule is, you do not talk about it.

The third rule is, always bring a little something to a gathering. Some pastries, some wine, it’s polite and considerate.

Woah! That guy with the lampshade on his head squeaking his sneakers on the floor with a motion like a bull might do is really fucking crazy. I guess I take it all back. My doubts of my sanity are gone and I’m able to go back to the coffee with nary a care.