I just noticed that I haven’t had a real thought in a long time. This is curious and baffling and I’m not quite sure why. Not enough coffee I guess.

Not enough time sitting in front of a computer, drinking coffee, to churn through notions that might just turn into a thought that would be worth typing.

That is assuming that there are some thoughts on this thing that are worth typing or even reading.

It’s a strange and wondrous thing to suddenly realize how much time has past.

It’s cold in Tucson. It’s fucking cold here and it feels like just yesterday that I started typing up my whiny introspective thoughts typing to figure out where it all went wrong when it was so damn hot.

What has happened to all that time? It’s crazy!

I can’t remember. I know I’ve done stuff. I’m sure I’ve read stuff. I know I’ve bicycled quite a bit in the past month (50 mile rides after years of stagnation and fatitudinous) and I’ve finally managed to get to 100 push ups. (Now for the one armed push ups. And then the no armed push ups!)

Slow mind is what I’ve got, man! I’m supposed to be breaking down a script for a movie I’ve gotten myself involved in that we’re starting to shoot this weekend and it’s so damn tedious. One day I’d like to be in charge of stuff so I can luxuriate in the command and control process rather than peon scum doing his Jimminie Cricket best to make something from nothing, giving it his college try and failing miserably. “Send me in coach! Just ’cause I don’t got no limbs don’t mean I can’t slither fast! Come on! Give me a chance coach! I got cleats on my chin!”

I have no idea what that means. When you have slow mind any thought at all is welcome.

Anyway, it seems that of late there’s a thing in my head that’s rolling around mulling over something. And what those nondescript notions are is beyond me. All I’ve got right now is the notion of a notion and a need for cash.

Man, I can’t believe…I can’t believe…what the hell was I going to type? What don’ t believe? I got preoccupied by the pixie-like girl walking by. Damn. I bet that was the thought I was waiting for too!

All this time! I was so damn close to insight and enlightenment and it was something I didn’t believe! I’ve been under the tree sitting in the lotus position and the demons are all over, man! And now the thought that I’ve been waiting for got sick of waiting for me when the cute girl walked by. It’s a tragedy that’s what it is.

Damn hormones! They screw up everything.

Now I’m just typing nonsensical crap while I wait and hope that the thought I was waiting for returns. Or that the cute girl comes back so that I can at least look at her again since the profound thought that would have completed the process just slid away.

Hmmm…waiting is not helping…nope. Neither is happening right about now.

This is the kind of thing that happens when your mind is slow, you’re waiting and pondering the fucking pointless universe and you are avoiding breaking down a script because you don’t think it will really matter now that I think about it.